My Philosophy Teacher is the Grim Reaper
by Midknight Shadows
Summary: Senior year is tough for anyone, as Sebastian Michaelis is about to learn when his demon-hating philosophy teacher, William T. Spears, decides to eliminate the threat he poses... using his attractive 'niece', Grell Sutcliff!
1. Idiots and Idiosyncrasy

**Please excuse any tense issues... I'm still trying to work out how to write this. It's almost supposed to be Sebastian's thoughts soon after things happen... I'm open to suggestion of how to write this!**

**Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING.**

* * *

><p>Please excuse any tense issues... I'm still trying to work out how to write this. It's almost supposed to be Sebastian's thoughts soon after things happen... I'm open to suggestion of how to write this!<br>Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING.

Sebastian was popular. He most likely could have had any girl in the school, had he wanted. 'So why?' he asked himself for the hundreth time that day, 'Why did I have to fall for THAT one?'

Sorry about that, that was actually supposed to be much later in this story. How on earth did it get here? What was that? Reader hook? OH! I got it. Sorry! Apparently that WAS supposed to be there and now I am supposed to introduce you to the beginning of the story! Well how about that...?

Let us start from the beginning, then! It begins two months into Sebastian's new life in a London high school. He wound up here because of an argument with his parents, ending in his assurance that he could survive like a normal(more or less) human for a whole year. Let's hear it from his point of view, shall we?

I was the new boy at the school. The mysterious boy who entered in his senior year. The one who radiated 'bad boy' and got all of the girl's attention and subsequently was shunned by most the other boys. I do well in all my classes and get all my work done, although not without a gloating smirk, so I am popular with the teachers as well. The one thing that all of the residents, students and teachers, seem to agree on is that I'm fairly near perfect. Too perfect to some of them. If they knew the truth, that I am quite literally a demon from hell, sent to a school by my equally demonic parents, perhaps it would shed some light on the situation. But... They don't. Well, most of them didn't.

My philosophy teacher, William T. Spears, is a Grim Reaper. I can tell that much by scent alone. The murderous way in which he glares at me also clued me in. He administered the grin just today, actually. I was suddenly thankful for all of the other people in the room. I do NOT want to have to explain to my parents that I was mauled by a Grim Reaper in my second month of the dare. Life can be hard when Lucifer is your uncle. Your parents are very uptight about certain things, like what species you were(none) and weren't(all, emphasis on Reapers and Angels) allowed to be mauled by. Therefore, I always make sure to be on my best behaviour for Spears, making sure never to give him any possible reason to keep me in detention, which would no doubt ended in an 'accident'. Like, a freak deathscythe accident...  
>Because apparently, those tend to happen when a demon and Reaper is stuck in the same room.<p>

"Here you are, Mr. Spears!" I chirped brightly, giving my teacher a slight smirk while handing in my homework. As usual, the Reaper responds with his 'Someday soon, demon' glare. I'm responding with an even smirkier smirk. It is my best 'But I'm such a perfect student you'll never find a way' smirk, reserved for only the smirkiest of smirking occasions. Usually that is met with indifference, but today, William responded with a smirk of equal smirkitude. A definite sign something was up. He moved back to his desk, but didn't sit down.

"Class! Today we have a new student! Who is..."

At this point, he noticed no new people were in the room.

"Not here yet."

There was a fast clicking sound down the hall, rapidly getting louder and louder until a teenage girl about my age, wearing a red blouse and red-and-black checkered skirt, burst in. I swear my heart skipped a beat. A lot of girls have hit on me, but I was never interested in any of them. Not a single girl, even the most attractive or intelligent ones caught my eye. But this one... This girl had a pronounced, yet somewhat delicate looking pale face... cat-like emerald eyes... And the most beautiful long red hair. I can imagine how it would feel right now... Silky soft, like kitten fur. I was drawn to her. I still am. And yet... I knew there was something strange about her. Something... Off?

"...Fashionably late as always, Sutcliff..."

"Of course, uncle!"

Uncle? Oh no, this girl was a Reaper too? My heart sank. There goes my first crush already? The other boys were whispering madly throughout the room about the new girl. I only heard snippets of the conversations. Some of them were impressed. Some of them said she looked like a prostitute. Some of them thought she radiated trouble. I simply thought she was radiant. I can't believe that I thought that about a Reaper... Is this William's idea of revenge? This is low.

"This is my ... Niece," William said, as though he were unsure of what relation she actually was to him. "Her name is Grell."

Grell? That was an interesting name for a girl.

"Sebastian?"

Oh crap.

"Since Grell is new here, why don't you help her get used to the school?"

Fuck my life. 

* * *

><p><strong><strong>_**So, what do you think? Should I continue?  
><strong>_


	2. Diss and Disparage

**I realised I forgot to finish changing the person from third to first in the first chapter! How embarrassing, and I'm always the one who rats on such things! Ah, I am ashamed. I have fixed it now. *hides in corner from embarrassment***

* * *

><p>So now I'm stuck with an attractive girl who has been taught all her life that my kind is evil and she probably wants to kill me. I guess it could be worse. I wondered if William noticed my initial reaction to this new girl whom-I-definitely-didn't-actually-like. Who was his niece. He was grinning smugly at me. Oh yeah. He noticed all right. I decided to keep on the 'bad boy' facade. Maybe she wouldn't realise I was a demon. I sighed. Yeah, maybe she won't notice that the sky is blue and the grass is green either. She plunked her books down on her desk and scooted it right up next to mine, earning an annoyed glare from William.<p>

"Great! Looks like we're going to get to hang out a lot, ne?"

"I suppose."

Why, oh WHY did she have to sound cute? Pull yourself together, Sebastian. She is your ENEMY. Your extraordinarily hot enem- BAD Sebastian. Stop thinking like that. Ug. But I swear, there was lust in her eyes, and how could I resist?

"So... Which class is this?"

"Wait... You didn't check your schedule? And your own uncle teaches this class! How can you not know?" I chuckled, my problems momentarily disappearing into the back of my head. The bad boy facade may be harder to keep than I thought.

"Oh, I don't bother with that trivial stuff," she replied, and then whispered into my ear so that the class could not hear, "I'm much more interested in the important things, like which classes have the cutest boys~! And I just hit the jackpot~!"

Did I melt? I think I melted. I somehow managed to keep my outer appearance calm. I had to pull myself together. She was a shinigami, a demon's enemy! If I wasn't sure before, I was now- even through her strong perfume, her scent was unmistakably that of death itself. Besides. Its just teenage hormones. She's pretty, that's IT!

"Well then," I smiled at her evenly, conveying nothing more than a trivial interest, "I suppose you'll have to stay close while I navigate you through the treacherous hallways. I hear more people die of starvation trying to find their classrooms than falling coconuts each year."

I was being sarcastic of course. The halls are a perfect grid and the school is small. You'd have more trouble fighting out of a paper bag than you would navigating these halls.

"Oh, saving me from losing myself in the maze of a school? You're too kind!" she practically squealed, although that is too volatile of a word. It was much more dignified than that. But... It worked on the same principle. It's really too bad that first attempt to dissuade her with heavy sarcasm didn't work. Things would be so much less complicated if it did!

We continued our whispered conversation for a few minutes when William SLAMMED! his book down on my desk.

"Excuse me, Mr. Michaelis and... Mrs. Sutcliff, but if you would like to continue this disruptive conversation, please do so AFTER class. If this happens again, you will both be put in detention!"

The only thing that held him back from sticking me in detention was the fact that others had gotten away with much worse and the students here love nothing more than tattling on the teachers' unfairness. Disaster averted. For now.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sorry it's short, I've been pretty busy as of late. But I do have an outline for what happens next!<br>**_


	3. Guile and Beguile

After class, I was supposed to show Grell where the lockers were. We walked side by side down the hall. I kept silent and walked with my hands jammed into my pockets, trying to ignore the numerous jealous glances either of us was getting. I refused to look at Grell, but she didn't seem to be bothered by this. She simply continued to bombard me with a million questions that she followed up with her own answers. I'm actually kind of thankful she turned out to be sort of annoying. It made it easier to ignore her. But then she decided to pull up right in front of me while I was lost in thought. I accidentally walked straight into her and knocked her backwards into her locker and tripping myself as well. My instincts took over and I held my hands in front of me to catch my fall... Naturally, my hands landed on the thing in front of me... Which was Grell's chest. I heard and felt the crunch of tissue paper that was jammed in her undergarments. She blushed like mad and I couldn't blame her- how embarrassing.

Also, she was flat?

"BASSY! Stop groping me!" she screeched, suddenly looking P-I-S-S-E-D. Whoa... She has shark teeth.

"MICHAELIS! SUTCLIFF! What demoralising behaviour..."

I froze. Spears? Here? Now? SHIIIIIIIT.

"Detention. All week."

DOUBLE SHIT.

"Both of you."

Kill me now.

"But... But Uuuuuunnnncle! It was an accident! We tripped!" pouted Grell. She's cute when she pouts.

"No complaints. Tonight. My office."

Whoop-de-doo. Well, I'll just have to sneak out then. Although who knows what repercussions that'll have tomorrow... What a mess.

For the rest of the day, I was fairly unapproachable. I glared at everyone and everything and nobody wanted to be within three feet of me. Except Grell of course. Despite the fact that I am supposed to hate her, I really just can't. She's so bubbly and innocent and talkative, she just brightens things up for me. Definitely not my type, she would have to have a bit more personality beyond happiness and bubbles, but perhaps we could learn to be friends. So I let her unending stream of words, I'm not even sure if they are questions, comments, stories... they seem to be just words for the purpose of filling up the silence, soothe me for a while as I think of ways to get out of this mess. Of course, when she stopped I didn't notice until I walked straight into someone. And of course the someone was Ciel Phantomhive. A hideously annoying brat, although his soul smells particularly tasty.

"Watch where you are going, you incompetent oaf!"

"Yes, well sorry, 'My Lord'", I replied sarcastically. I made a mental note to contract with him at some point. That would be one less annoying brat and one more delicious dinner for me. Let a soul like THAT sauté in revenge and pain for awhile, which is a specialty of us demons, and you've got a full course meal better than anything any cook could make!

"Mind your manners. Did your parents grow up in the gutters?" sneered Ciel.

"Oh, you have NO idea," I snarled right back. Grell suddenly clung to my arm.

"Bassy, don't bother. He's not worth it. Just ignore him and pay attention to me!"

"And paying attention to you is going to be any more entertaining?" I expected my harsh words to deter her. Instead, she held her hands together and swayed from side to side in ecstasy.

"Oh Sebby~! So cold! So cold~!"

Okay. Unexpected reaction.

Ciel let a sly grin spread across his face, his half closed eyes tilted mockingly.

"Looks like you've got yourself a girlfriend, huh? How long will it be before you break her heart and move on to the next?"

"Shut up, Phantomhive. I'm not a whore!"

"Would Sabine and Felicity agree? I wonder."

"They seemed a lot more pleasant than they were. Besides, I never laid my hands on either of them."

And that was the truth. I hadn't. They were gross, unpleasant girls. They tried to make me watch horrible things, like My Little Pony. Let me tell you, Uncle Satan is HITTING himself for not thinking of such a torture first. And then they tried to tell me about evil things like cheerleading and healthy diets. Grell chose this moment to assert her own opinion. She leaned over to be at the boy's eye height.

"My Bassy would never ever cheat on me. Ever. Because we're soul mates."

She punctuated this by poking him hard in the chest with every syllable and glaring holes into his soul.

Mental note: Don't piss her off.

I think it's best not to contradict her right now. It's true- I wouldn't cheat on her. Mostly because I have no intention of going out with her, for a few obvious reasons like her family would kill me for being a demon and then my family would kill me for her being a shinigami. Whoa whoa whoa…

Hold the phone here. This story is starting to sound uncomfortably familiar.

* * *

><p><em><strong>Sorry this took so long. I haven't exactly been prolific, have I? I've had lots of work to do- expect me to become more active in about a month, when I FINALLY can finish everything ELSE I need to do. Blah. I'll finally finish all of my stories...<strong>_

_**Your Red Goddess~  
><strong>_

_**MadamGrellSutcliff  
><strong>_


End file.
